For some, quarantine is effecting some people more than others. For the Seniors it hurts the most because their final year was cut short, but for me it hurts more than most of my other classmates. The summer before my 4th grade year, I was diagnosed with anxiety. My 9 year old self carried more weight on her shoulders than most adults do. She was constantly focused on the what if’s and all the awful things that could happen. It completely debilitated me. I didn’t eat or sleep for about a year. It was life changing for my family. My mom crying on the bathroom floor because her baby is in so much distress and carry’s so much on her shoulders.She feels helpless because she can’t make me feel protected.My younger siblings lying awake at night because they can hear their older sister crying in her bed. The person they are supposed to look up to can’t find comfort in her own home. I lost a lot of weight… an unhealthy amount from me not eating and getting so worked up I get physically sick. My sister was in second grade at the time and had to walk me into school on the first day because I did not want to go. How awful it must have been for her. I didn’t learn much that year because my mind was always in another place. I didn’t do well in class and I could barely manage to make it through the school day. At the time I didn’t know if I would make it through the 4th grade. Through out my elementary years things got easier. I was doing better in school most days but others not so much. Not only did I miss out on school experiences, but I skipped out on birthday parties and I lost a lot of friends.

Middle school was a whole new challenge I faced. I had just gotten comfortable at my old school and now I was moved into the middle school. Unfamiliar students,teachers, and classrooms. I spent most of my 7th grade year in the assistant principals office, not because I was in trouble but because I could not sit in class without my mind wondering off. I was back at square one. I had very few friends and was bullied quite often. I didn’t play sports or go to sporting events because I did not want to be at the school longer than I had to. Once that bell rang I was out. I walked into 8th grade year without a tear in my eye. The year was off to a great start. I still didn’t play sports because I had no friends on the teams, but I gained more friends and built friendships. This year wasn’t that bad.

Then my parents dropped the news that I would be transferring schools after the school year which terrified me. I cried and begged them not to make me transfer but I enrolled and was soon to start out my freshman year as a pioneer. The first day was rough, but I never felt as if it dragged on forever. I quickly made friends and joined volleyball. This was the first year I was ever truly happy at school. I worked hard to make good grades and I thrived in school. I went on to be apart of the cheer team and softball team. I did it all. I knew my mom had made the right decision for me and my mental health. I thought that no year could beat my freshman year, but now that sophomore year is coming to a close I realized I was wrong.

My sophomore year was the best one yet. Not only did I continue to play volleyball, softball, and cheer but I also added basketball to the mix. I got closer to my class and just took every opportunity life threw at me. In March, my world flipped upside down. Schools closed. Sports cancelled. Sophomore year ruined. I no longer got to spend the last months of the year with my best friends. I am not trying to compare my pain to the seniors, but to a girl who lost a whole lot of years already this was the worst thing to happen. I hate that all the memories meant to be made can not be made and that our new normal was zoom calls and face masks. I know I have two more years left but I really wish I could have a complete four years of high school.

That’s my story and why going to school means so much to me and why I take never take a moment at school for granted. I know myself amount many others would do anything to be sitting in those desk waiting for our summer to begin. This year we seem more eager to get back than to start our summer.

At my small school everyone is close. The senior class is very near and dear to the hearts of the staff and the underclass men . The class of 2020 has overcome more than just losing the end of their senior year, but they also lost someone they loved deeply. In September of 2018, their best friend,classmate,and brother went home to be with Jesus after a car wreck. The entire school was heartbroken but for that junior class their world crumbled. They were so strong, it amazed me. Some came to the school the following day to speak on behalf of their class. They were given time off between the accident and the funeral. They returned to school as a united front to face the challenges of returning to a classroom that no long felt the same. This class overcame the greatest battle known to man—the death of someone you love. This year they started their Senior year unknowing of what lies ahead. No one could ever imagine a world wide pandemic cutting your senior year short, but then that’s what happened. These students have worked 13 years for the experiences they were soon to take on as seniors in high school— senior prom,capstones,the last day of school, the senior walk, senior skip day,and having the whole school witness them walk the stage. But as we know that did not go as planned. Senior prom was postponed.Capstones were done in an empty room.The last day of school was spent sitting in a classroom dreading the following week. Senior skip day was turned into quarantine.Senior wall turned into sitting in the drive way as staff drive by.And Graduation is limited to specific guest. None of what was listed lived up to the expectation they had dreamed up for years. I can’t imagine the thoughts that go through their heads everyday as they begin their schoolwork in their homes. I know my thoughts and I am not even a senior. These kids put on their jerseys,backpacks, and letterman for the last time without realizing it. My heart goes out to them. They didn’t expect this and they don’t deserve this. So to the Senior class of 2020. I am sorry, but the two things that Corona can never take away from you is the memories you made at PCCS and the accomplishments that you have made over the past 13 years. I am beyond proud of y’all.

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton